| |
Better SexIt is perhaps a shame that while we live in one of the most advanced cultures in the world and yet know so little about how to make each other happy in that most human of all endeavors, sex. With a few small additions to your sexual vocabulary you can break out of boredom and lead happier, more satisfying sex lives. Sexual Positions
Reminiscent of "quickies" and illicit sex in alleyways, standing is actually one of the more complicated positions to achieve, at least face-to-face. Insertion can be difficult; standing, the vagina is not tilted forward for easy access. Since women are on average shorter than their male partners this position may require a short footstool or convenient staircase step to make it possible. At any rate, someone may want a friendly wall to hold both of them up during this act.
TimeWhen should we have sex? When you have sex is a decision you will start to make only after you've gotten through the initial "all the time!" stage. Eventually, though, any person will develop a habit of making love with a certain pattern. Acquiring that pattern is the start of boredom; breaking that pattern can be the road to a new discovery. LocationWhere should we have sex? In bed, to start with. Seriously, there is no "better" place to makelove than a bed. It's designed to hold people lying down; it's evendesigned for them to be a little rambunctious. What about the shower? The shower, as well as the swimming pool, have their disadvantages. For one thing, lubricant doesn't last very long in environments of such overwhelming volumes of water. For another, usually the only position available is standing, with all of the attendant problems of differences in height. Another common problem is that the floor of most bathtubs is very slippery, especially if you spill lubricant on it! However, it's frequently the only place other than the bedroom where both of you are likely to be comfortable and naked, especially in winter. Don't let all the "problems" listed here stop you from trying out what could become one of your favorite places to makelove. And outdoors? Having sex outdoors has its own challenges and rewards. Many people feel that sex outdoors is closer to nature; others feel it is more illicit, "in full view of the whole sky." If you're going to have sex outdoors in any position other than standing, plan ahead of time to bring a blanket. Avoid using bug spray and sun block until afterwards-- both taste awful. On the other hand, sunburns on your genitals can be excrutiating; take care. Caveat lover... Having sex in strange places is a turn-on for many. How strange a place you want to make love is a matter of some concern of course, since outside of the privacy of your own home, having sex in full view is likely to arouse the interest of the local constabulary. Getting arrested for public indecency is likely to catch the attention of your employer as well. Plan any such dalliances in advance and scope out your intended rendezvous point for possible problems, interruptions, and routes of escape if necessary. And whatever you do, put your used condoms and wrappers in the trash can; stopping litter isn't just good citizenship, here's it's a matter of sheer good taste. |
Everybody starts out inthis so-called "missionary position": man on top, woman on thebottom, face-to-face. It's where we were when most of us lostour virginity. This position gets a lot of bad press these daysbecause it's "old-fashioned," or perhaps because it's "patriarchal."Actually, there's nothing wrong with this position; it affordsexcellent support for thrusting, close intimate contact betweenlovers, and is an ideal position for conception. The woman may liewith her legs spread wide and to the sides, or may draw them up toher chest. In either position, the man cannot reach her vulva formanual stimulation although in the first he can reach her breasts.
A 
This position is highly recommendedin the few "how to lose your virginity" manuals still lying around,mostly because it allows the woman to fully control the speed at whichsex occurs. There are several different positions classified as "womanon top." The most common is that she straddles his hips, taking hispenis inside her, and then lies atop him, either with her legs bent orstretched out. She may also choose to just sit straight up atop him,sliding up and down; this position is both visually stimulating for theman and allows him to play with her breasts freely.
This position is for sex in slowmotion; the angles are all wrong for any sort of vigorous thrusting.The man sits in a chair or cross-legged on the floor while the womansits astride him, usually face-to-face although it can work equally wellif she faces away. This position is good for caressing and intimacy.Some people recommend rocking chairs for this position.
These positions all mirror the"on top" positions, except that the partners now lie on their sides onthe bed. They can be achieved face-to-face, at an angle or from behind.The one difficulty with this position face-to-face is that someone hasto rest their leg atop their partners; after only a few minutes thissometimes causes cramping and pain. Done when the woman faces awayfrom the man, it can be slow, relaxing; one can almost fall asleepcomfortably like this. In this position, it is known as "spooning."(The term applies mostly to the act of sleeping in that position, notnecessarily the act of sex.)
Although several positionsalready described can also be covered under this term, most people usethis term to describe the position in which the woman kneels on herhands and knees while the man enters her from behind. Some peoplestrongly dislike this position because of the lack of intimacy andthe suggestion of male "dominance"; others like it for the freedomand strength that can be employed during the act of intercourse.The term "doggy style" has been employed to describe this positionin the past, although this descriptive is inaccurate at best.
